I didn’t feel well about my final for orgo 1 but I was also impassioned about the overall exam. I’m not sure if it’s a sense of defeat indisguise, overly tired or just felt trapped in the result of it. It made me realized all the same details that I had missed and failed to really gasped the meaning of them. I guess I’ll start over again. Relearn. I’m fearful that I won’t be able to find a part time job so I can somewhat support myself to keep going through school. I have to remember why I’m doing this in the first place and also, not everything is hopeless.
The little girl who pushed against the waves and got stuck in the depth of the sea; surrounded by jellies …Oh, how desperate she must be feeling. Suffocating in the natural world she loves and had hoped to be loved back in the ways she loved. Be you and be true. But why are we rejected?
I have been safely and securely brought up by my parents yet I have no wings of my own to fly high and experience the other kind of adulthood. Instead, still a baby chick in definition of not having achieved anything as an adult. However, Age does not let you slip by without its notice. ‘Oh, how joyful and beautiful welcoming of another year’ said Age. ‘You’re an adult, but not my definition of an adult’ Adulthood smirked. ‘Matters not,’ age said happily, ‘I’m still turning 27’.
Adulthood pointed towards others and blatantly compare age to others of the same and said, ‘You’ve accomplished nothing! Look how reliant you are on your parents! Oh, how pathetic! OMG, I can’t stand you. Out, out, out you go!’
Age doesn’t get it. ‘I’m only aging on my own terms. What’s wrong with that?’ Age thought long and hard but still didn’t understand why Adulthood got so upset and irritated about aging and accomplishments.
Adulthood’s soliloquy. Oh, Age. You won’t and can’t understand that time is flying by. World expects me to be an adult now. Live on my own, shop, work and…that’s all. Is that all? I shouldn’t question it. Everyone my age are all doing the same. I should be too! Should I? No! No more questioning! Age is foolish, I shouldn’t follow and should compare. Compare. What am I? A pear? An apple. Even they are different. But…World. What World said…sighs.
(Adulthood exited, dejectedly).
It’s been a while since I’ve felt down and have a terrible pounding headache. Some worries in life are hard to ignore but we just have to move forward, daro!?